Actor Sara Ali Khan recently opened up about growing up with her mother, Amrita Singh, following her parents' separation. She described her mother as both the "good cop" and the "bad cop." Sara recalled noticing differences at school but said her father, Saif Ali Khan, remained present for advice.
Sara Ali Khan reflects on growing up with a single mother. Here are six ways parents can help children process their feelings when they miss their other parent.
Growing up, children often notice the little things adults might overlook. It could be seeing both parents at a school event, watching a friend run to their dad after class or wondering why their own family looks a little different from someone else's. And sometimes, these seemingly ordinary moments can bring up questions and feelings that children may not know how to express.
Actor Sara Ali Khan recently opened up about growing up with her mother, Amrita Singh, following her parents' separation. In an interview with Filmfare, Sara reflected on how her mother took on the responsibilities of both parents, describing her as both the "good cop" and the "bad cop". She also recalled noticing the difference during parent-teacher meetings, when her friends had their fathers beside them while she had her mother. Despite these moments, Sara spoke warmly about her mother's strength and her ability to balance firmness with affection. She also explained that her father, Saif Ali Khan, remained present in her life as a source of advice.
Sara's experience opens up an important conversation about single motherhood and the emotions children may experience when one parent doesn't live at home. Missing a parent, feeling different from peers or wishing things were otherwise can be part of that experience. The key is to help children understand their feelings without making them feel that their family is any less complete or that they need to hide their emotions.
Here are six ways single mothers can help children navigate these moments with reassurance, understanding and plenty of love.
1. Let Children Express Their Feelings Without Rushing To Fix Them
When a child says they miss their father or wishes both parents lived together, a mother's first instinct might be to reassure them that everything is fine. While the intention comes from a place of love, children sometimes need something simpler: the space to feel sad without being told to cheer up.
Instead of immediately offering solutions, acknowledge what your child is feeling. Try not to take these moments personally, either. Your child can love their life with you and still miss having the other parent around. Those feelings can exist together, and neither takes away from the bond you share.
2. Answer Questions About Your Family Honestly And Age-Appropriately
Children are naturally curious, and their questions about family arrangements may change as they grow older. A young child might simply want to know why their father doesn't live at home, while a teenager may ask more complicated questions about relationships and separation.
The best approach is to offer honest, age-appropriate answers without overwhelming children with adult details. Explain what they need to know in language they can understand, and leave room for follow-up questions as they arise.
For instance, if your child asks why you and their other parent don't live together, you might explain that adults sometimes find they cannot live happily together, but that this decision has nothing to do with the child. Avoid blaming the other parent or sharing painful relationship details that children aren't equipped to process.
3. Help Them Navigate Moments When They Feel Different From Other Children
Sara's recollection of noticing other fathers at parent-teacher meetings highlights something children may experience: becoming aware of their family structure through everyday interactions with their peers.
It could happen during a school event, a family-themed classroom activity, a birthday party or a casual conversation with friends. Your child might ask why their family is different or feel awkward when someone asks about their father.
Rather than treating these moments as something to be embarrassed about, help children find simple, comfortable ways to talk about their families. You could practise responses together, such as, "I live with my mum, and my dad lives separately." The level of detail they share should be entirely up to them.
It can also help to speak with teachers about inclusive classroom activities, especially around occasions such as Father's Day or Mother's Day. The goal isn't to single your child out but to ensure they don't feel excluded because their family looks different.
4. Create Small, Consistent Rituals That Make Home Feel Secure
When family arrangements change, everyday routines can offer children a reassuring sense of stability. Something as simple as having breakfast together before school, reading a bedtime story or setting aside Sunday afternoons for a favourite activity can become an important anchor in their week.
For single mothers managing work, household responsibilities and childcare, these rituals don't need to be elaborate or time-consuming. A ten-minute conversation before bedtime or a regular walk after dinner can provide an opportunity for children to share what's on their minds.
If your child spends time with their other parent, a predictable schedule can also help them know what to expect. When plans change, explain the situation calmly and as early as possible rather than leaving them uncertain.
5. Let Children Love And Miss Their Other Parent Without Feeling Guilty
For children whose parents live separately, expressing affection for one parent should never feel like a betrayal of the other. A child might return from a visit talking excitedly about their father, ask to call him or admit that they miss him. These moments can bring up complicated emotions for adults, but it's important not to make children responsible for managing them.
When it is safe and appropriate for the child to maintain a relationship with their other parent, encourage that connection without making them feel guilty about it. Avoid negative comments about the other parent in front of them, and don't ask children to carry messages or report on what happens in the other household.
Sadness, questions and occasional frustration can be understandable responses to family changes. However, if your child seems persistently withdrawn, struggles to sleep, experiences significant changes in appetite, loses interest in activities they once enjoyed or begins having difficulties at school, it may be worth seeking additional support.
Start by having a gentle conversation about what they've been experiencing. Depending on their needs, a paediatrician, child psychologist or family counsellor can help them understand and work through their emotions.
It's also important to remember that children respond differently depending on their age, temperament, relationships and circumstances. One child may openly discuss missing a parent, while another may express their feelings through irritability, silence or changes in behaviour.
Seeking help isn't a sign that you've failed as a parent. It simply means you're making sure your child has the support they need, including support that may be difficult for one person to provide alone.
Raising a child on your own can mean carrying a great deal of responsibility, from making everyday decisions to managing difficult conversations and providing emotional reassurance. But you don't have to eliminate every difficult feeling your child experiences. You don't have to fill every role perfectly, either.
What matters is creating a home where children feel safe enough to ask questions, express sadness and know that they will be heard. It's about ensuring that, whatever a child's family looks like, they know they are loved, supported and never expected to navigate their feelings alone.
